Saturday, May 30, 2009

Blogging for the Cure - Remembering

Grandma & Me, 1976

There are so few photos of my grandma and me out there. Most of them, like this one, have partial images and are candid shots. I am told that I was the apple of her eye, though. It is apparent from the look in her face the amount of joy her first granddaughter brought.

There are few things I remember about her. Considering that I was just 2 when she died, even those memories are fuzzy and faded over time. I remember climbing the stairs to her second floor apartment and yelling that I was "home". Yes, home. I suppose that I felt comfortable there, spoiled by the grandma who loved me so much. I remember going to the hospital on the day she died. I remember the candy that we got in the gift shop. I remember the elevator.

While I have these few memories, I don't remember her. I cannot tell you what it felt like to sit in her lap or to have her smile at me and tell me that she loved me. I cannot remember her smile or the crinkle of her eyes. I cannot remember (though I have been told the stories) about her popping out her dentures to scare us little kids. I simply cannot remember.

I'm sure that some of you who have been around her for a while remember me telling the story of my treadle sewing machine. Well, that machine belonged to her. She used it to sew dresses for her family. It was not just a pretty piece. It was USED. The thread holder was missing so she attached a nail. The wood is worn from hands running across the front piece of wood. I could, in theory, replace the nail she used to hold the thread. They are available and are not expensive. And yet, I don't have the heart to do so. I do plan to get a new belt for it and learn to use it. I want to make a quilt top using that machine. I don't know why but for some reason, it seems like by using it, I will, for just a few moments, have her with me.

If you have your family close to you, take time to tell them that you care. Tell them you love them. Tell them to see doctors regularly so that if something like this ever happens, it can be caught quickly and hopefully won't end in death. Most of all, show everyday that you appreciate what they have done for you.

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